Both Child2 and I got up feeling ratty this morning.
I remained quiet, just doing what needed to be done so we could get a move on out of the house.
Child2 made it clear that he was annoyed at me expecting him to get up and go to school. I mean really, how dare I even suggest this???
Getting him to get dressed was a bit of a struggle and he took his time and whined throughout. I ignored him and continued to get myself done. Eventually he finished dressing himself.
I asked him to come and have his breakfast. He said NO. Under normal circumstances I would have reacted to the NO because I’m all about the tone and the manners and I actually expect a “No Thank You” as opposed to a NO. At that moment I decided to let it go. I’m not really in the habit of forcing my kids to eat anyway.
I then asked him to brush his teeth. Again, he said NO. My blood started to boil and I had to count to 10.
I do NOT tolerate defiance – in my home that is a form of tantrum and it gets dealt with accordingly. I am all about my kids expressing themselves WHILE being kind about it, but outright defiance is not negotiable under any circumstances. I don’t actually care if I am, I don’t know, scarring them or ruining their lives in any way. Someone needs to keep the therapists in business and so, when they are adults, they are welcome to contribute to the economy in that way if their Mommy not tolerating defiance has somehow ruined them.
Under normal circumstances I would have nipped it in the bud there and then and I would probably have actually dragged him to the bathroom to do it for him. Luckily for him I was too tired to care and it’s like he knew this. So we left home without him brushing his teeth.
When we got to his school he waited for me to walk in with him and this is where I forgot to be the adult and went all tit-for-tat and childish on him. I said NO. And then I used my angry voice and all the facial expressions to match, and I told him that if he was allowed to say NO then I could do it too and that he better get out of my car right away and walk in by himself because I won’t be walking in with rude little boys. Of course he didn’t take it well AT ALL. Eventually Child1 got out of the car and walked him in because I was not going to budge.
To be honest, I didn’t even feel bad. Which in itself makes me feel bad. When I fetched him this evening he was happy to see me and had moved on. I had too.
He didn’t really eat much dinner and I don’t know if he could possibly be coming down with something. He’s been sleeping since 6:30pm and I’m off to bed in a few minutes too.
I think that things will be better once we’ve both had a good sleep.
I know I should have been the adult and not gone all tit-for-tat but today I was just too tired. Tomorrow is another day and I KNOW it will be better so I’m not going to beat myself up about this any longer.
I know I’ve been very scarce but how are you doing? How do you deal with defiant kids? Have you ever gone a bit childish in response to a kid behaving badly? Are you ever just too tired to care?