One of my goals for this month was to go back to Weigh Less.
I have stayed away for a few weeks for two reasons:
- Things in my life were crazy for the past month or so – not really a good reason because I can slot in at any group if the time doesn’t work for me.
- I was starting to hate that scale. Let me explain.
The bad thing about having to weigh every week was that I was starting to become obsessed with the numbers on the scale. This was not what I wanted. I used to beat myself up if I lost less than 400g. I would eat something “illegal” like a piece of chocolate that I’d been craving and then do star jumps in my room so that it wouldn’t show on the scale. I stopped socialising because more often than not it would put me in a position where there was nothing suitable for me to eat and I would end up eating all sorts of pastries etc.
I do not want to be that person anymore. WL is ultimately a life-style change. I really love it and it works for me. I love that it has the perfect balance of carbs, protein, fruit, vegetables, healthy fats and eventually treats. I love that even if I should adjust my lifestyle to vegetarian or vegan, or if I fall pregnant or am breastfeeding, then there are excellent options for me too. I love that I am never hungry and that I have the world of energy if I complete my formula and drink all my water for the day.
I listen to what other people eat on their weight loss plans and I honestly believe that my plan or rather, my lifestyle change is the better one. Their plans limit them so much and I often wonder what will happen when they decide to go off it start eating carbs or whatever?
Since I started running, my weight loss has come to a standstill. I believe that I am losing cm’s. I am not measuring myself but I can definitely feel it on my clothing. Fact is, I have not been losing grams or kilograms and this made me feel despondent.
My GL did explain that my body will go through a period of adjustment when I start exercising but that it would eventually settle down. Still, I wasn’t coping with losing 200g at a time and after chatting with my DH I felt that my obsession with the numbers on the scale was bordering on unhealthy.
This is what I have decided:
I am going to eat as well as possible during the week AND be good with the water – I am currently doing this anyway so it is really no adjustment. I menu plan (including lunches and snacks), I shop weekly for all the fresh produce and perishable foods that I need, I watch my portion sizes. This is part of my lifestyle and won’t stop.
On the weekends I am going to allow myself to eat what I want BUT I will watch my carb and fat intake – am not going to start eating junk and fried foods again.
When I am invited to a party I will try to eat something before I leave to prevent me from overeating on food that is not good for me. I will save my carbohydrate serves in case I decide to have a glass of wine or two.
I will continue to run – I really miss it when it doesn’t happen. I will focus on becoming fit and healthy and NOT on the numbers on the scale.
I will go back to WL towards the end of September to see where I am at – I don’t currently own a scale and I am so glad I didn’t give in and buy one.
For now, my obsession with the numbers needs to be tamed. In fact, it needs to be nipped in the bud.
I have gone though a significant thought process this past weekend and I feel comfortable with this decision. I need to learn to trust myself and stop letting food and numbers control me. I need to not live to eat. I need to learn that I eat to live.
I believe that my relationship with food has matured in the last few months. Food and I have certainly come a long way. It no longer controls me. It’s no longer on my mind ALL THE TIME. I do occasionally comfort eat but am aware of this and am working on it.
I truly believe that I can do this. And I will.