My siblings and I are not friends. This makes my heart very, very sore.
We are not enemies and we are kind and civil towards one another. They love and adore my kids. I LOVE and adore their kids and I am the Aunty who LOVES to spoil them.
My siblings have just have never been able to cope with the weirdness and the oddness that is me.
They are great friends with one another. Just not with me. We are VERY different from one another.
When I am in trouble I know that I can call on them and they will help me out without hesitation. When my kids need things they will sort them out. BUT. There is no relationship. There is no friendship. I really would like there to be a friendship.
I would say that there is a fair bit of rivalry. And I will go as far as saying that we will probably become estranged once my parents die. Sad but true.
I have tried to reach out. It hasn’t worked. It’s never reciprocated. So I have stopped trying.
I am extremely envious of people who have great relationships with their siblings.
I don’t know how and where to start or rather continue with my own. So for now, I am giving up. Fact is, I do desire a friendship with them. It’s not happening. So I’ll just pray and hang in there so long.
Are you friends with your siblings? How do you nurture those relationships? Any idea how to build a relationship with a family member that doesn’t appear to be interested in building a relationship/friendship?
Btw….many people assume that if there is a small gap between siblings then there will be a close bond between them. I am living proof that this is not true. We don’t have significant age gaps between us. Also, my kids are 7 years apart in age. They have a GREAT relationship. I know that at some point Child1 will find his brother weird or whatever but I ALSO know that as adults they will be fantastic friends.
No, we’re not friends either. Nothing funny but just not good friends. The physical distance doesn’t help either
Ja I think we are. We don’t talk often but when we get together we have great fun
We grew up as a close family of 4 and I think we will always stay like that.
There is 10 years age difference between me and my brother, so i grew up as an only child really. I don’t ‘know’ him very well, and we are VERY different. But, since I have moved to Ireland I have got to know him better. I think that’s because we know we are in different countries so we make more of an effort to stay in touch. We both phone each regularly. I try to think of ways i can show him that i care. He was in hospital a couple of years ago for something quiet serious and i texted him and sent him little parcels, just to let him know i was thinking of him.
Maybe think of little things you can do ‘to build a bridge’. I sent my brother pictures by the kids – who can resist those ? : ) x
My siblings and I are quite close and we chat almost every day. And yes I agree there’s no guarantee based on age gaps. I’m 5, 8 and 15 year gaps between my siblings and I. I’m the oldest but we still get along very well. I know siblings with lesser age gaps who don’t see eye to eye (for many reasons)
Do your siblings know how you feel? If not, I’ll say make an effort to let them know.
Oops, that was supposed to read I am 5, 8 and 15 years older than my 3 siblings
I am afraid that I am only close to one of my siblings…and we are six children. What complicates things a lot is that we adopted B and she was one of my sisters biological children. She doesn’t cope well with the choices she made back then…and the big thing missing between us is trust.
I am fortunate in that I am close with all my siblings (sister and 2 brothers) My sister and I squabble from time to time but I know we have each others backs no matter what.
YES!
I am friends with both my siblings and love them dearly. I couldn’t imagine my life without them and not being able to share the often mundane details of my life. We weren’t close growing up as there is an age gap, but we are now and i ADORE them both.
Oh I wish I had siblings – I look at for instance Mel and Shayne’s posts about their siblings and wish for it (I am an only child) . And nope, not close to the Hunny’s brother or his wife – taking ionto account that they live far from us and she is 10 years younger than me and a bit weird . Anyways, I will keep working on that one – gosh, I have tried.
My sister is my best friend. We’re 18 months apart and when we were growing up we would often fight like dog and cat but as we’ve grown older we’ve realized how much we love and appreciate each other regardless. I haven’t always seen her as my best friend, it took an incident a few years ago when I was in a horrible place emotionally and she was the person who was there every minute by my side. Making things better. That was such an “aha” moment for me and since then I’ve really tried to make more of an effort with her and it’s paid off. We’re very close now .
I’m sorry to hear that you aren’t close with your sisters
BTw – I am great friends with two of my cousins though – and the one is 10 year older than me.
Ditto what Shayne said:-)!
My brother, sister and I are friends. My brother and I used to fight like cat and dog growing up and I would have NEVER thought I would have ever wanted to see him again after we left home, however we ended up sharing a flat for 6 years. I am older than my sister by 10 years, but we are best friends. I think the age thing actually helped as I was not around when she was teenager, so we did not fight or bug each other.
I could not imagine my life without them, although my sister has recently moved to Australia – but we still “chat” daily.
I am friends with my brother.
I have this theory that when siblings squable like crazy when they’re young they usually end up friends when they’re grown up, and when they have don’t they just drift apart later. I’ve even taken a poll amongst my colleagues, and so far my theory holds water.
My sister and I are good riends. We are not BEST friends but we are good friends. We talk to each other nearly every day (bbm or verbally) and we absolutely adore each other’s children. We fight like cat and dog as well tho (she is older but doesn’t act like it, her immaturity and lack of focus drives me INSANE) but we are friends for sure.
I’m sorry that you don’t have that with your siblings.
xxx
I get on with my sister, but we’re not close. I’m not really interested in her life and the reverse is also true. Still, she’s my sister and I love her dearly.
My sister is 7 years younger than me and we are not close at all. Out of self-protection I avoid her, but it is a very long and very sad story that I cannot blog about as my family reads my blog and the damage would be too much.
Maybe it is enough that you at least like your siblings?
Pingback: RESTORE vs Move On | Unwritten