When I first found out that my son had ADHD I blamed myself. I kept wondering what I could have done to avoid it. I kept thinking that maybe it was something I ate or didn’t eat when I was pregnant. I kept thinking that maybe it was because I didn’t bond with him while he was in utero. I even thought that I was being punished because I didn’t welcome him when I found out about him. I forever wondered what I could have done differently.
It took me many years to move on from the “what-could-I-have-done-to-prevent-this” trip that I was on. It took me a long time to forgive myself for not wanting a child when I found out that I was expecting him.
Because the reality is that there is NOTHING that I could have done to prevent it. It just is what it is.
There has been much research into the causes of ADD/ADHD and there are many findings to suggest that there is a genetic predisposition to it. There are specific studies where they look at family groups per se and it has been proven in the case of identical twins that if one twin has ADD/ADHD then there is almost 100% chance that the other twin will also show symptoms.
Some years ago my DH and I made a list consisting of EACH member on both sides of our families. It was VERY clear that there was ADD/ADHD on BOTH sides of our family. Our poor boy didn’t stand a chance and in fact, one of the reasons why my DH and I wrestled with the idea of having a 2nd child was because of this possibility.
ADD/ADHD often presents in people who suffered some form of neurological damage either before or after birth and certain developmental disorders or syndromes like Foetal Alcohol Syndrome are usually associated with high incidences of ADD/ADHD.
Certain things can exacerbate ADD/ADHD symptoms – specifically things like poor diet, a chaotic environment and/or stressful situations.
Are you liking my posts? Am I boring you? Sorry if I am but to be honest, I am really enjoying writing about this. My posts next week will be more personal – just have to get a few factual stuff out first.
This weekend I will be writing about the co-morbid conditions associated with ADD/ADHD (there are MANY) and I’ll write about our decision to medicate our son.
Later.
x
I think it’s natural to want to blame ourselves even though its illogical
I’m interested in reading. It would help if you spread out your posts though.
I’m really learning a lot from your posts on ADD. Not boring at all. A real eye opener
We can trace my brother’s ADHD back to a family predisposition of it and of anxiety disorder. My mom still struggles with what she could have done differently to prevent it.
I am enjoying your posts, please keep writing.
I am thoroughly enjoying reading your posts! Informative and very well written:-)
My knucklehead also didn’t stand a chance! Myself, my sisters, my dad, his own dad… The list is a long one.