So I’ve been thinking all week about this post that I wrote last week. I have been thinking about that particular friend and after giving it some serious thought and hearing my DH say it (shame he really tried to be kind about it but he does lack the diplomacy gene sometimes!), I realised something:
She’s not into me.
I felt incredibly sad about it all week.
Sad about the fact that we once shared so much.
Sad about the fact that I am so naïve about this kind of stuff. I mean seriously. How could I not realise it?
Sad about the fact that when we spend time together it really is cool.
And I did something that I shouldn’t have done. I internalised it. I made it all about me when it probably isn’t all about me. People do change. They outgrow one another. They find other more interesting people to hang out with. Such is life.
I was at the point where I was analysing every conversation that we’d had in the last while. I was thinking about her body language towards me when I last saw her. I kept thinking about whether the signs were there all along. They were. I was just didn’t want to see them.
So. Apparently we have a date for 27/04. I don’t know what will happen and if it will happen. I’m actually not going to follow it up.
I don’t know if I would find it easier if we had a conversation about it. Although I would prefer to have some closure I also don’t want it because I think I would find it too painful and I know that I will feel the rejection something fierce.
But. It’s OK. I’m OK.
There are other friends who are AWESOME. Other friends who ARE into me as much as I’m into them.
And so today I am moving on. And I’m OK with that.
Have you ever had a friend who was not into you?
How did you handle it?