- My DH had a difficult day today. Based on this, I decided that going away this weekend would probably not be a good idea. I know that my DH would have been OK with it – he was very clear about it, but I suspect that he will need me a lot this weekend. I am obviously bummed and very, very disappointed but unfortunately this is just the way things worked out. I wish it weren’t so.
- I went with my DH today to make arrangements to have my FIL’s body released from the mortuary after an autopsy had been completed. This required us having to first identify the body. I was a bit anxious about this (I am creeped out by dead people – even if I knew them) but it was OK. Almost healing in a way. The staff was fantastic and so, so compassionate. It’s not like in the movies where they slide the body out of a fridge. It’s actually very humane and done with much sensitivity in mind. I think that it takes a special kind of person to work with death every single day of their lives.
- I am feeling a bit stuck and exceptionally frustrated. Absolutely NOTHING that I had planned for this month worked out. I really just need July to get done already. July is usually my FAVOURITE month but this particular July of 2011 has been the worst one of my life!
- It would seem that one requires a degree to read a knitting pattern. I honestly don’t know why every single thing needs to be abbreviated. I am googling abbreviations and stitches ALL THE TIME. Either no one keeps the beginner in mind or I am just looking in all the wrong places.
- After eating like a pig last week I seem to have lost my appetite. Probably not a good thing but I am not going to force myself to eat.
That’s where I am at for today. Sorry for this glum post. I am really not feeling it today and I am trying my utmost to pull myself towards myself.
Have a great week.
xx
I think sometimes glum is the most sensible place to be! August will be here soon and hopefully things will be a little gentler..
If you cannot just be yourself here…where can you? You had a lot on your plate this month and with your FIL passing away I can understand that you are not in a happy place….but that is okay…we all have seasons. Soon this month will be done and we will be closer to summer.
I had a feeling you might cancel your Jhb plans…. very disappointed to not have you right here
but of course, I totally understand!
I’m also over July. Roll on August.
I haven’t even got D anything for Wed – will do a card, nice supper and DVD (quality time) with him and treat him on the weekend.
death is crap. it affects people in ways we would never imagine. we think we are coping when all of a sudden the wheels fall of because something completely arb happens or is said to us. I feel for your dh – suddenly it was monday and life went on again. it’s almost as if over a weekend our lives are ‘on hold’ – does that make sense? Am sure not going away was a difficult decision to make but deep down in your gut you knew what you had to do.
Am happy to help with your knitting if you need – just shout.
Send your lost appetite my way please
I’m sorry that you’re having such a crappy July. Let’s hope August is fabulous!
I’ve never seen a dead body. Not sure I want to either. But I’m glad that you at least got good, compassionate service.
Usually a knitting pattern would have a glossary where they explain the abbreviations used. It would certainly frustrate me if there weren’t one!
Ah sweetie – you can expect feeling down after a death of a loved one. You may think that it is lighter because it is an in-law, but if you loved them, the loss is huge. Cut yourself some slack, and give yourself time.
I think cancelling your plans (although a little loss of its own) might have been the best.
Sorry that July was such an awful month for you. You’ve been through quite a lot. Death takes it toll on people and affects everyone differently. I’m sending you a great big hug, hoping that somehow it will make a difference.
Yupp…July can move on now…had enough of it…and whilst it is leaving, it can take this cold weather with it..
Loss takes a huge toll, give yourself and your husband time. It affects us all in different ways.
As for the knitting it gets easier with time, it is like a new language and I still google all the time